Yo, it's the return of the, Gifted Gifter
The secret Santa grab bag sifter
The Grinch, sleigh hangin' off the ledge deadlifter
The best thrifter, the tear jerker
The Santa's little help employee of the year worker
The smile bringer, the joy inside the child lingers
The boy inside the crowd proud, he's a loud singer
The whole choir, the bow tier
The snowplow and the snow tires, the coat buyer
The "Oh, you shouldn't have her," the Birkin bagger
The Gifted Rapper, they told me it's the thought that counts
But really it's the count that matters
Accountin' hacker, bank amount countin' backwards a thousand smackers
It's the return of Kris Kringle, the piss singles, that shit tingles
Sendin' checks twice 'cause the name's on the list wrinkle
My chips Pringles, my chips been gold
My green mingle, your green mean slow
It's the young born again, good hood ornament
With a little chicken like a Cornish hen, Amazon orderin'
Cohiba importer of Evergreen water in
Wrappin' all night, will he ever bring the chorus in?
Fireplace bright like I threw ten menorahs in
Ten more kinaras and a whole fuckin' forest then
I buy the doll in the mall that the store is in
I hide the presents in the dressser and they draw us in
My dawg doin' moves, he said this shit is on the floor again
Feds was on his trail but he got fifty names in Oregon
I bought cases bigger than the suits that you see Lori in
James still sittin' but I'm sendin' a DeLorean
Look it's Mister Christmas Bonus
Mister Made His Brothers Bands, Mister Nicholas Jonas
Mister Big Cojones but bigger heart, that's where the homeless home is
The Home Alone kid
It's the return of Kevin McCallister, the Swiss Mister
The Hot Chocolate Mixer that gets pictures
And big, big cousin misser, the quick fixer
The Wizard of Oz, big blizzard, the big gifter
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh
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